Sunday, December 14, 2008

Review ka review, ham ka ham ho jaye!

Rab ne Bana di Jodi

I laughed, I cried, I ate ham! Yes I ate Samosa Chaat too, but later - after the ham had been consumed. During the movie my kids dozed off and my husband embarrassed me by yawning too loud and too often. But then they dont love SRK for his hamminess like I do. I am an unabashed fan. I am as they say... lattoo for SRK in the movies.

Okay first things first... the movie was a homage to SRK. Funny, the actor in an homage to himself and every film he has ever acted in. Lucky Ducky! How many of us would get to do that!

Secondly... SRK celebrates the art of Hamming it up. He does... he almost makes overacting a joyous thing! And his likeability factor makes us rejoice in it with him. He is the Ham Laureate! The meek average man, the rowdy rather vulgar alterego, the lover, the friend every frame he is in, he played unashamedly to the peanut gallery. I do not know if he means to overact quite so much, but the fan in me would like to think he did his entire part with tongue firmly in cheek. I really want to believe that he was laughing at himself as much as I wanted to while his chin quivered and his lips pursed up and his rheumy eyes filled with just enough tears to become lakes of pathos without spilling over untidily onto his cheeks.

For a man of his age (he is my contemporary so I should not snigger too loud) SRK's bod is impressive and he flaunts it well. Alas he didnt take off his shirt for me. Perhaps in his next movie. After OSO I was left panting for more. But oh my.... does he need a facelift or something... badly! He is looking haggard and my heart breaks to even say that.

Everything else about the movie is just filler. Literally. The story, the lead actress, the sets, the script, the supporting cast, the music and yeah even the myriad shameless endorsements. It is all really quite forgettable.

Having made the statement that the story is just filler, I will not bother to give you more than the outline. The script follows a linear, completely improbable story. Something along the lines of... Average man marries Average girl, but they are not "doing" each other yet for all kinds of stupid reasons. Average girl falls for vulgar showman type man who is really Average man in disguise. Average man happens to be a peculiar and rather unlikeable (to me) mixture of emotional masochist and chauvanist who enjoys playing emotional passive/aggressive games. They dance together and talk a lot about Rab. Then Average Man and Average Girl finally get together in the end and finally and hopefully start "doing" each other in the epilogue. Dammit... if they had got thier minds around to do the sex thing in the first few frames of the movie, perhaps Aditya Chopra would not have a movie to make.

The lead actress who has an unmemorable part is perfectly cast. Her looks are average, the acting skills are average and everything about her is unthreateningly average. Her dancing skills are average to boot. Her mannerisms and deportment are perfectly in sync with who she is supposed to portray. She could be any one of the gori, chitti, punjabi, very average girls I knew in Sadi Dilli. The clothes fit, the punjabi size nose fits. Her very ordinarniness is what makes her perfect for the part. A stunning or distinctive looking actress would have been terribly miscast in this story. In her very averageness she did well enough in the movie so I cannot fault her for anything. She really did not detract from anything. On a cynical note I will add that unless Anushka finds what more she has to offer ... looks, talent, powerful godfather, fewer clothes or noteriety she will find the going very hard in Bollywood. I do not think middling parts for average girls are at a premium in Bollywood.

Vinay Pathak provided able support. A talented actor and consistantly willing to let go of his ego and self, he provided polish in his loosely written part. He skipped between comic relief, pathos and detemination seamlessly. I wish his part had been more tautly written and he had better lines to say.

The camerawork was precise and good. The colors of the sets were beautifully photographed and in that the movie was a visual treat.

The movie could have been edited down by atleast an hour or so. Just cutting back on the trillion close up shots of a pursed lipped, quivery chinned SRK would have cut the movie down to about half its length.

Amritsar as location was interesting, as it has not been cinematically explored in Hindi Cinema too often. In that it seemed fresh. The Golden Temple looked lovely. The Amritsar streets could have been a dozen places in North India. Did the story actually need to be located there? Probably not, except Aditya Chopra probably already had the title picked out. The word "Rab" is very, very Punjabi and since that word is used about a million times in justifying the non-story of the movie, a Punjab town it had to be.

Being that the story and script were so lame, the music and choreography could have been the reason d'etre for this movie. Unfortunately both were dissapointing. I cannot think of a single song or peice of background score that stuck in my mind. The Item song was badly done and a complete waste of resources. What a waste of 3 popular actresses who could have added magic. And I said 3 not 4 since I did not intend to use the words Lara Datta and Magic in the same sentence. Whatever was Aditya thinking... he the maker of the perfectly scored and choreographed movie DDLJ! He crashed and burned in this department.

So did I enjoy it and was it paisa vasool?

Being that I paid matinee half price and my son got in for free (yes I have connections... hehehehe) and the Samosa Chaat was not bad and it was all about SRK and SRK and more SRK...

Yes I had a good enough time.

Next time, SRK take your shirt off. I will not be satisfied with less than that!


*Aham* said...

i like saaaa rook, i admire his energy, the enthusiasm... i loved his acting (excluding bits and parts where he was repetitive)

But this movie, this movie could have been so much better. The screenplay was loose. The music was "ewwwww, not once again". The movie was too punjabified. And the characters we all not well etched.

Just Good performances and good camera work will not help.

The new chokri has been given a mamoth of a responsibility. Though the girl has done very well considering that this is her first movie. Adi chopra couldve rested the film on firmer shoulders. Say, a Kajol or a Rani.

And Ms. Chammak Challo, shirtless shahrukh was much better than this nerd who is seen 'adjusting' all the time. If its done once its humour, but if its done again and again its disgusting. And John ka back even if fully covered will interest more people than shahrukhs... Hai na.

Aditya chopra, I expected much more from you. This movie was appalling. I feel so.

Renu said...

Aditya Chopra seems to be one movie wonder only, and RNBDJ, people will see once atleast for SRK:), though reviews are quited varied, TOI has rated it only 2 and half:(
First time here:)

hitch writer said...

SRK sells, damp squib movie still it will be a hit, this is the testimony to the man's saleability... bah

Anonymous said...

Ah, so you like ham. Poor husband and poor children;-)

I haven't seen 'Rab ne..' yet, but having just read your review I know that I don't agree with the moral of this movie. Meaning, sabra ka phaal hamesha meethaa nahi hota!!! I am referring to the "doing" here:-)


Anonymous said...

Ah, his face is suffering because he's committed himself to a hot bod. Can't have both at his (our) age :)

Anonymous said...

Good review. Hmmm I may check out the movie once my exams are over. Sounds like a good entertainer, nothing else.

Double Seven said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Double Seven said...

In the entire movie wherever Surinder Sahni was shown, I could only see his face, featured with JET BLACK LIPS (Kudos to over excessive chain smoking) and BIG FAT SAMOSA EYES.

Anushka Sharma's LEGS are hot. Her face is not beautiful as rightfully judged by De her self. Her skin color is white and she acts well enough though.
She especially looks hot when she is in her dance/ gym outfit. Her legs are too beautiful so are her buttocks. :)

Movie is definitely a one-time-watch. It is a bit contrived though because in real life such a thing can hardly happen where the wife could not even recognize her husband in disguise!!
That according to me was highly superficial. And if Raj thought that Taani liked her as Raj then why couldn't Suri took tough stance on his makeover as a modern day wannabe Bombayite Raj?
That according to me was a bit sluggish an approach.
But I wouldn't be surprised if the fat-nosed, jet-black-lipped Shah Rukh Khan bags Filmfare for Best Actor award next year for his acting acumen in this filam.

Good Day.


PS: Who is this girl in your blog homepage? She seems to me that she is damn cute. I can say that without even looking at her thopda. :)

Ham is terribly bad for health. Many white Americans themselves are turning to vegetarianism or fruitarianism. :) STOP EATING MEAT!

ek-ladki-anjaani-si said...

You know I came back and asked Rajesh to put a fake mooch, oil in his hair! Strange thing is I still recognized him!!

Come on - give me a break - is she blind ya fir wohi ghisa pita dialogue pyaar mein andhee hai? How could Adi make such a lame screenplay? How could SRK do it?

Meri sorry hai - but a complete waste of time, waste of money. The only good thing out of the movie was, like yours, chaat paapdi for me ;-)

Anonymous said...

Another Kiran, glad to know son's health is improving. Do have a fun time with your art projects and please stop by to read my review of 'Rab Ne...' on my blog, when and if you find a moment. Yes, I watched it yesterday:-)

Anorak @ Cinematically Speaking

Double Seven said...

I saw Anorak's cinematically spoken review on this free world of the Internet. And I was glad to know that there were actually some people on this planet who weren't Shahrukh Khan's fan!
My analogy was better apt than his though about comparing Shahrukh Khan's nose with a big fat Punjabi samosa. His was to compare it with a pakora! lol.
He mentioned about smoking and how it had made his lips blackened. Same to same I did.
He said in his review that the movie was a one-time-watch and so did I!

Wow! I am happy to read through his review in this free world of the Internet and I am just too glad to have another Shahrukh Khan hater apart from my self.



Rahul Viswanath said...

I kind of liked the movie to some extent and also felt it should have been made for an 2hr target audience .............

Anonymous said...

@ Double Seven

Hope you'll be swinging by the site more often! My blog is only dedicated to movie-talk though.

I am not an SRK-basher, but I am not a fan either. However, I thought the movie and SRK as Sahni didn't exactly suck. Both were far better than I thought they were going to be.

I don't like pakodas and I luuurvvveee samosas, hence my analogy.

Until you mentioned here, I hadn't thought about SRK's lips;-) I said he should quit smoking. And that's because I think he is looking tired and haggard as a result of it. It cannot be the age for sure, because 43 is the new 33 and he lives well!

Double Seven said...

I thought you were referring to his lips because they were black! lol.

I am not any Shahrukh Khan hater myself, but I just don't find him cool enough. He is great at acting but his nose is ugly looking...
I compared it to a samosa because of the similarity of shape. Pakora nose is what Om Puri has :P.

I love watching movies, critically watching movies. I love analyzing them even while I am still inside the theater.

Even I think that Rab De... is a delight to watch. Even though the plot sucked ass, there was certain kind of a feel-good factor when I came out of the movie theater. I liked the movie till the very end... the end credit scene was also good.


PS: Are you male or female? I am confused. (Anurag?) lol.

Anonymous said...

@ Double Seven

Well, they do come in all shapes and sizes, don't they? I mean, the noses!!

And only to satisfy your curiosity, I am a 'she'.

Double Seven said...


Yeah even my nose is quite fat. hehe. :)

Your name is so funny!!
I know one guy whose name is Khanvict and he is from Afghanistan!- But I call him Konvict. LOL.





77/ Suyashh :)

Anonymous said...

@ Double Seven

What's wrong with my name? Waise, I'll let you into a secret - It's not my real name!!

@ Another Kiran

Sorry for hogging your blog-space.